Ivanka Trump Just ACTUALLY Became Our New First Lady

If you’ve been joking that Ivanka Trump would make a perfect First Lady (given Trump’s numerous remarks through the years about how he wants to…yeah), prepare to have your goddamn mind blown.

Ivanka Trump won’t be receiving a salary, but she will be getting her own West Wing office, government-issued communications devices, and security clearance (yes, the jokes kinda write themselves).

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In the past, The Donald has described Ivanka as “voluptuous” and a “piece of ass” who has “the best body.” He has also, as we’re sure you aware, said that “perhaps [he’d] be dating her” if she wasn’t his daughter. He also famously talked about how he kisses her as often as possible in comments so creepy the Dr. Oz show was forced to edit them out. To add to the hilarious nature of this new situation, these photos exist:

In a role befitting of Daddy’s Little Nazi-in-Training, Ivanka will reportedly serve as his “eyes and ears” — a strange role amid reports that Trump is stationing people to monitor the loyalty of those within his administration.

“While there is no modern precedent for an adult child of the president, I will voluntarily follow all of the ethics rules placed on government employees,” Ivanka says of her new position, adding that she intends to give daddy “candid advice and counsel, as I have for my entire life.”

She, of course, will maintain ownership of her business — because apparently the President’s daughter — sorry, our new FLOTUS — can’t possibly have conflicts of interest, either.


Featured image via screengrab