Trump Just Lost His SH*T After Report Claims He Paid Russian Ladies To Pee On His Bed In Moscow (TWEETS)

Get ready to explain to your children what a “golden shower” is, because it’s going to be a hot topic in the news for anywhere between a month and four years thanks to Donald Trump. A new report reveals information from a man who CNN says is a former British spy who is trusted by American intelligence but now does opposition research. On Tuesday, the network reported that a two-page summary had been provided to President Barack Obama and Donald Trump, and Trump is pissed off now that the content has been released in full by Buzzfeed.

While it is important to note that the report is not completely verified, the document reveals some information that Trump probably wanted to keep private — like that time he was staying at a hotel in Russia and paid some nice ladies to pee on his bed (not to mention evidence that Trump’s campaign worked directly with the Russian government).

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“According to Source D, where s/he had been present, Trump’s (perverted) conduct in Moscow included hiring the Presidential suite of the Ritz Carlton Hotel, where he knew President and Mrs Obama (whom he hated) had stayed on one of their official trips to Russia, and defiling the bed where they had slept by employing a number of prostitutes to perform a [redacted] show in front of him,” the report reads.

Naturally, Trump couldn’t handle this “big reveal” and completely flew off the handle on Twitter:

This was just too much for the people of Twitter to handle, and they responded perfectly to the puddle Trump had stepped in:

Intelligence agencies are still working on verifying all details of the report, but remember that these allegations come from someone they know and consider credible. In the meantime, let’s just laugh at the mess Trump has landed himself in.


Featured image via screengrab